something different, not wrong, just different

My car left without me today... yes Mandy passed her drivers!! YAHOO! I can barely describe the feeling of relief when she walked through the testing doors with a look of absolute triumph on her face. I couldn't bare for her to be disappointed again, though I suppose if she could bare it, so could I. She was funny when she said, "mom, I knew I had it, I was coming back to the building thinking that as long as I didn't hit a pedestrian - I had it!" What a rush!

Now... I don't know what is worse. Waiting for her to pass, or waiting for her to bring her and her sister home safe and sound from the movies, in the big city... I know every parent goes through this with every stage. I have become very good at squashing any feelings of angst for my kids, that is until there is something to worry about. I guess this is the same thing, only a new level. She's never before had a huge pile of metal to back up her actions. Ever since the girls were little I have completely forgotten about them when they are not with me. It was for my own good. (and probably theirs). To think about them, was to worry. So I chose not to think about them.

Its a little hard today. I want to fret. But I know this too shall pass. It won't be today I get a frantic phone call... it will be some other day when I least expect it. Yes, a little dramatic, I know. Its just what's in my head and heart - right now.

I'm going to go read my book. The library called today - the latest installment of the Jamie & Claire Fraser saga is in my hot little hands! What better way to distract myself... hmmm, I guess there's always a glass of wine...

would you believe:

1. A tow truck just came for my car. I'm waiting patiently at work for DH to come get me. I drove to the bank for work and for some odd reason I backed into the spot. Don't think I can tell you why. But sure glad I did. When I pulled out it was VERY difficult. I proceeded back to work and it didn't get much easier - my freaking power steering was GONE! I managed to get back to my parking spot - and back it in - took like 6 manouevers - I figured I'd be getting a tow... Hmmm, what's that smell, oh fun - smoke in the car... DH said it was just from fluid dripping on something hot. I swear that car is going to drive me to drink. We've spent about $2000 on it this year alone! But how do you get rid of a car that is paid for...

2. The tester that said he'd squeeze Mandy in for her road test has not returned any emails or phone calls. I've now wasted 3 weeks where I could have already made the appointment - so at this moment she has one in mid-January. What a joke. I'm so disappinted in him. He was so good with her and was so accomodating and willing to help us out. What's up with that???

3. That I'm barely exercising right now. I feel like for the first time in about 10 years that I "don't work out". This #*$&# hip is giving me a run for my money. The good news I had it x-rayed last week and the Pan Am doc says the joint is fine. Could be a bursitis type thing. Whatever. He says I won't injure it more by "working through the pain". Last night I put in a token amount on the treadmill. Tonight I'll try again. Physio is regularly punishing me, so hopefully that will help some time soon.

Pity party done now. Things could be worse. I'm grateful KT is finally out of the hospital and praying that all news from the doc's come back ok.